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Don't be a Psychopath - Be Your Authentic Self

What does it mean to be authentic?


Good evening, Clarice.

It’s more important than ever to be able to connect with people. We’re still coming out of our covid comas, and the communication landscape has shifted for good. What hasn't changed is that most communication is about intent listening. Pay attention when others are talking and form your responses based off their remarks. If you have an idea to share, make sure to weave it into the conversation instead of hammering people with it. Make people feel respected and interesting when you talk to them.

This is a difficult task if you’re a psychopath, but here’s why it’s important for you, psycho or not: The value of building authentic connections cannot be overstated.

It’s a skill set that many have never honed, so let’s get into how you can deepen your relationships, personally and professionally.

First off, don’t be one of those pickup artist, skeevy scumbags who rolls in with the salesman tone and tries to sell everybody. Just take a genuine interest in whoever you’re talking to and care about them.

The world is more interesting with you in it

The World is More Interesting With You

Genuine relationships form the foundation for personal and professional growth. We’re social animals, our traits are best unlocked in groups, but that doesn’t always mean we need to be clumped up together. Instead, it means we need to recognize the greatness in those around us and lift them up. Getting the right support, opportunities, and sense of belonging are dreams for most people. We just don’t get it like they used to.

So if you want to stand out, be the bastion of support, recognize and create opportunities, and bring people in. Don’t just say you want to create community, be community everywhere you go.

People are out there doing what they love, posting what they love, talking about what they love. They just need a first follower, someone to hype them up and turn them from a nobody into a leader.

You can make leaders everywhere you go.

You can be the first person to follow the next Einstein, Michelangelo, Bieber. Try to see the good in a person for no other reason than to see goodness and greatness and watch how you create deeper, more meaningful relationships with ease.

It’s important to nurture authentic connections and explore strategies for overcoming barriers to authenticity.

If you’re genuine but people think you’re fake, does that mean you need to change your approach?

No. Don’t do it.

Just keep on being your genuine self, either those that doubted you will see your realness or they aren’t the kind you want around you anyway. Being genuine and open is a great filter. Networking is how you meet people to follow and lead.

Closer, please. Clo-ser.

Talk to someone, listen to what they say, ask a pertinent question.

That’s it.

That’s the secret.

If you were just here to get the easy answer, you can go now.

The rest of it is less easy and more messy. People are going to have chemical reactions to your closeness, whether you’re in person or not. They will feel validated, they will feel good about you, they will feel listened to.

You want all these things for yourself when you’re talking about your ideas, so give it to others and see how quickly and vehemently they want to give it back.

You’re the person people want to talk with and listen to if you’re the person that wants to talk with people and listen to them. We can go back and forth about personality types and introverted/extroverted qualities but the fact is you have to get along with people, so why not do it in a mutually beneficial way?

Nice and close.

Most people want emotional support, most people want to enhance their personal well-being, and it’s just a conversation away. If you have trouble doing this with people you know, get out into a group you don’t know and start talking to people. You’ll find people listen more when listened to.

Authentic connections are rooted in genuine interactions, where individuals express their true selves without fear of judgment. These relationships are characterized by trust, honesty, and mutual respect.

Nurturing authentic connections offers numerous benefits across all aspects of your life. In the professional realm, authentic connections lead to mentorship, collaboration, and new career opportunities.

Overcoming Barriers to Authenticity

Fear of rejection, judgment, vulnerability.

These are the three demons you must slay if you want to be an authentic version of yourself. You will be rejected. You will be judged. Acknowledge your fear, accept it, and get past it.

Where it was, only you will remain.

Embracing your vulnerability is critical when it comes to interactions, both in real life and on social media. It requires courage to be open and genuine to allow others to see your true self. Start by cultivating compassion for yourself and practicing vulnerability in a safe environment. Surround yourself with supportive people that will appreciate your authenticity.

When you’re ready, take your show on the road.

The Power of Networking

Unlocking new opportunities and expanding your connections is key to helping you grow.

When you attend a meeting, conference, workshop, you have a chance to extend your influence and knowledge for the price of a single conversation.

Friends, mentors, and partners suddenly appear before you, wrapped in the personalities of those you meet. Personally and professionally, networking is a great way to tap into a wealth of knowledge, experiences, and resources you might not have solo. By connecting with a diverse range of people, you’ll be exposed to different perspectives, ideas, and potential collaborations.

Often, career advancement and new job opportunities depend on your soft skills, so focus on the people around you.

Identifying Networking Opportunities

Seminars, conferences, industry events are all excellent networking opportunities. Social media platforms like LinkedIn and other professional online communities provide you avenues for virtual networking and relationship-building.

Take advantage of any industry-specific gatherings you might be eligible for, join relevant online groups, and seek recommendations from colleagues and mentors on what’s happening and where to be.

Making Connections

Active listening and empathetic communication are the cornerstones of building a relationship organically. By truly listening to others, you glean new insights and perspectives and better understand the needs and aspirations of those around you.

Engaging in meaningful conversations and showing genuine interest in others' lives fosters trust and rapport. Find common ground and shared interests and ask some questions, even if you look like you don’t know.

People love nothing better than to introduce others to their interests and hobbies.

Nurturing Relationships

It takes time and effort and energy to keep connections strong. It’s an ongoing process that requires investment, physically and emotionally.

Regular check-ins, meaningful conversations, and providing support when needed contribute to the growth and maintenance of authentic relationships. It’s essential to show genuine care and interest in others' lives, celebrating their successes and being there during challenging times.

Be there for them; they’ll be there for you.

As always, open and honest communication is key to building trust and deepening relationships.

Blending Relationships

Everything is interconnected. Personal and professional relationships are often going to intertwine. It’s important to set firm boundaries and manage expectations in different contexts. You can remain professional and still bring your authentic self to the workplace but it takes a little work and a lot of tweaking.

Trial and error is the only way to fully understand the right balance for yourself. That being said, leveraging genuine connections allows for mutual support, mentorship, and shared opportunities that benefit both personal and career growth.

Foster Authenticity in Networking

Bring yourself to the table, and ask nothing more of others than that they do the same.

Instead of focusing solely on self-promotion, try to begin mixing everyone’s message until you find something that every person in the room can agree on. When you can break down a message from the community in a way that everyone believes is correct, you’ve created something powerful and universal.

Every person in the room can feel they contributed and no one needs to vie for credit because it’s clear they all had a hand in forming the idea. Deconstruct your own ideas to their smallest part and you’ll begin to notice a similar vein running through every interaction you have: people want to agree with you.

Once they want to agree with you, all you need to do is make something out of your conversation, whether it’s exchanging numbers and socials, setting up a time to meet for coffee for deeper conversation, or straight up embarking on a new campaign together. You will craft the best message for your company and the best way to do that is to shut up and listen.

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